Long Hair And Femininity

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Long, beautiful and healthy hair isn’t just Trad and Feminine, it is “a glory’ – it is God’s special gift for displaying the softness, femininity, and tenderness of a woman.

Like the head covering in Corinthians head, it is also a symbol of submission to God and man, and thus a reflection of the Divine Order.

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This is why many feminists and modernist, liberal women tend to cut their hair or wear short hairstyles.

It is subconscious rebellion against men, a rejection of submission to patriarchal authority and ultimately, defiance against God.

Notice that the keywords I use in the first paragraph are LONG and HEALTHY.

Using hair extensions, perms and other unnatural hair processing may fake temporary length, but are never healthy for your hair in the long run.

This is why they tend to result in hair breakage, traction alopecia, balding patches, thinning hairlines and so on.

In my article about Modesty and Cosmetics, we are not to engage in beauty or grooming practices that deviate greatly from our natural God-given beauty, and yes this includes using caucasian-textured extensions if your hair is naturally afro-textured; perming or straightening naturally curly or wavy hair hair, or colouring your hair blonde, if you are a natural redhead.

It is the sin of immodesty and also the sin of simulation – creating an appearance of something that you are naturally not.

Simply, care for your hair as naturally as you can and not would it grow long, healthy and beautiful, but it would also be a “glory”

Now, do not think that long hair is simply the preserve of the young – it is not.

And for the ignoramuses who think black women can’t get long hair – the crazy excuses these feminists will come up with as a reason to be LAZY ๐Ÿ™„ – I am a black woman, pure black and not mixed, with my heritage from West Africa.

Here are a few pics of non-mixed black women with long hair and one of these pics is me!

Biblically, older women never cut their hair and historically, long hair in older women wasn’t just seen as the ripeness of womanhood, but as a sign of feminine dignity and wisdom.

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If you have to, put your long greying locks in a chic bun if you do not wish to wear it loose daily, but never ever follow the diabolical modern trend of adopting shorter hairstyles as you age.

You are STILL a woman.

You do not suddenly become invisible or turn into a man simply because you are past childbearing age.

Our Lady, model of femininity and womanhood, pray for us!



 ad Jesum per Mariam



42 thoughts on “Long Hair And Femininity

  1. Dear Paige,
    God bless! I am new to the blog, but what I’ve read so far I love! I did have a quick question, though. I have severe atopic dermatitis and in the summer, it acts up. I want to grow my hair out, but every time I have in the past, I’ve had a terrible rash break out on the back of my neck. I have it in as bob right now, about nape length. Is it still feminine at that length or should I just suck it up and deal with the itching and the rash? I mean that honestly and not obnoxiously. I hope this all makes sense.
    Again, God bless!
    In the United Hearts of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph,


    1. PS: I should add that I am 19 now and have been trying to deal with this, with my family’s help, since I was 3, and I did recently take myself off of all my ointments and creams, about a year ago, and that surprisingly actually helped my skin. Thank you for your time and God bless!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hello, I have enjoyed the information you provide on Catholic femininity for a while and you are one of the causes of me wearing skirts and dresses exclusively. The one thing I have very much wanted has been lovely long, healthy, natural hair. I have never dyed it or done anything to maltreat it whatsoever, I have even taken very good care of it. Hairstylists and dermatologists are puzzled all the same as to why it can not and will not grow out past just below shoulder length before it fizzles out and gets dry, loses elastin, and breaks off and thins. I am young, only 19, and this has been the case for 5 years at this point. I feel terribly unfeminine with my hair so short, and it is somewhat a source of shame for me. My nutrition is good, and I am healthy as far as everyone can tell. Do you have any advice or counsel to give women who can’t grow their hair out past shoulder length? Not advice for growing out the hair…Women like me have heard that already, a billion times, and followed all of the suggestions and it isn’t working. What is your advice for accepting the fact that you will have short hair if you can’t grow it out? Do you think there is a particular reason God gives some women that cross? Thank you for promoting the dignity and femininity of women and helping other women to see and understand themselves in light of the Good Lord. God bless you.


  3. I wish my hair was as thick as yours, my I ask which hair products do you use? Maybe you know some good products for thin hair without volumen?


    1. Amla hair oil is very good for hair growth and thickening. Another thing that can help thicken the hair is massage castor oil into the scalp 1-2ce a week.


  4. Hi, I am an African American Catholic and I find this really odd. You say it includes afro textured hair that is straightened but the first picture of a black women you show shows her not in afro hair but long blowout hair which is a form of straightening. I’m not sure you understand how African Americans wear their hair. How we protect our hair is through protective styling such as extensions or braids or cornrows. That’s how we get longer hair. Our hair doesn’t grow like white people. The most important thing God wants from us is modesty. I understand the short hair thing a little more but many people cut their hair for a fresh start and better hair journey. I feel you have many hair in misconceptions especially about black people afro hair.


    1. Thank you, Ada for revealing your inherent ignorance and racism.
      Itโ€™s not like I myself am a black woman of African origin (pure black, NOT mixed) and have been natural for over 15 years!!


      1. Also just to confirm since I just recently saw your update on the article. I DO genuinely believe that afro hair can get long and healthy. Again, I will say. Please reflect on how you address people because I felt hurt that a fellow black sister with beautiful hair in fact decided that it was fine to look down on me. I suggest looking into the lives of the saints who embody virtue of humility and obedience.


      2. I did not look down at you. I looked down on your attitude and attacking assumption about me. That was beyond hurtful. And donโ€™t come preaching humility at me when you visited my website with prideful nasty assumptions.
        You donโ€™t get to attack people and then play victim!
        With all sisterly respect – grow up!!


      3. And regarding your other rambling nonsensical name-calling comments that I did not approveโ€ฆโ€ฆ
        No, sunshine, i do not have to approve any disrespectful comments in my own space โ€ฆ..none whatsoever.

        I mean
        Are you high?!!
        You want me to approve your other nasty comments because you want my readers can see them.
        Why?? To provoke drama?!
        To gain attention for yourself??!

        Because you think that you will somehow get my readers to agree with you?? Or gang up on me?!
        The utter entitlement on you!!

        Iโ€™m sure my readers know that there are other nasty comments from you that I did not approve cos a person with that much arrogance, pride and entitlement as you display is bound to ramble and rage and be nasty in the comments. And they know this.

        But I donโ€™t need to allow you or your nasty arrogant entitled energy anywhere on MY space.
        Itโ€™s called boundaries.

        You can rave and rant and rage and foam at the mouth about me all you like, but you can do that elsewhere.
        Not in my space!!

        The more you comment, the more I realise how right I was about you. So far – you displayed arrogance, pride (which you tried to project on me by telling me to be humble ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„ how original!), entitlement, drama provoking and attention-seeking.
        This is my last comment to you cos I have tolerated you long enough.

        Now, GO AWAY!!


  5. I love your site and all the recommendations. I do want to add, that some women don’t cut their hair out of defiance, but in humility or sometimes to support someone with cancer. You can look lovely and feminine with short hair.


    1. Thanks for the comment. My statement was not referring to women who make that sort of sacrifice. Also, generally women who make that sacrifice donโ€™t make having short hair a lifestyle – it is usually a temporary thing.

      Example, Kate Middleton donated her own hair to help children dealing with cancer. She did this a couple of years or so back, and obviously grew out her hair again.


  6. Hi. Thankyou for your blog. I love to read it.
    And I agre 100% that long thick hair is very feminine and beautiful.
    I strugle with this a lot, since I was born with very thin hair. It grows pretty fast but unfortunately it is very thin. When your hair is thin it looks very weird and unflattering to grow it long. I think it gets worse with age. Most old ladies have very thin hair and have to wear shorter hairstyles.
    I tried many different hair products, suplements like b komplex, zinc, biotin, silica…and try to have nutritious diet and healthy lifestyle.
    Do you know any other tricks to grow thicker hair?
    Also, do you think wearing hair extensions to be more feminine is sinful?


    1. Hair extensions cause damage in the long run and not advised.
      Have you tried looking into your diet? A diet low in protein or anaemia can cause thinning hair.

      The best I can recommend right now is to use thickening shampoos and condition; avoid heat appliances in the hair and use very simple hair styling techniques. I have very fine thin hair strands too and a styling technique that really helps add volume, bounce and thickness to my hair is the old fashioned wet roller setsโ€ฆ..like the ones women did in the 40s

      I put them in overnight cos I donโ€™t want to use a hair dryer. By the next morning, the rollers are dry and the style will last for 3-5 days.

      Depending on the length of your hair, Iโ€™d recommend using medium to large rollers. Small rollers will give a tighter and smaller curl


  7. Are bangs acceptable, or do I need to grow them out?

    Is it okay to use a flatiron to curl my hair and give it a style? I am growing it out from a pixie cut (which I got before my reversion to the Church) and it is currently almost to my shoulders. My natural hair is pin straight. Is it wrong for me to style it?

    Thank you for your help!


  8. what is your advice when it comes to cutting one’s hair shorter because of tension headaches, joint and nerve pain etc? I am absolutely miserable when my hair gets longer than maybe shoulder length…but I know some ladies who go shorter, with their health in mind for pain management….


  9. Thank you for this fantastic post! I really needed this!
    I have long thick straight hair that reaches to my bottom. My husband absolutely adores it. In fact I always get compliments on my hair.
    However since reverting back to the Church and embracing traditional values, Iโ€™ve decided I need to stop dyeing my hair (not my natural colour) and have it dyed back to my original natural colour and maintain it from there. The colour I have now, which is beautiful and dazzling, seems to only stir lust in men and vain intentions in myself. Iโ€™ve had it this colour for over 15 years so itโ€™s a huge change for me. Satan is clever though and is trying to tempt me with all kinds of vain thoughts and ideas.
    I was also worried about having long hair as I get older but this article has given my inspiration and resolution. I am nearly 32 and itโ€™s already quite unusual for a woman my age to have such long hair. Everyone I know my age has medium to short hair. I will probably get ridiculed as I get older for keeping long hair but I donโ€™t care now. I will keep it long and maintain it for Godโ€™s glory and for my husband!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. What are your thoughts on women who cut their hair (for sake of argument, to shoulder length) in order to donate it to women and children who lost their hair to cancer, alopecia, etc?


  11. Hi! Just found this website and am loving it ๐Ÿ™‚

    Related to this but on a different type of hair, what are your thoughts on female depilation? Shaving, waxing, laser hair removal, etc.? For a year now, I’ve been wearing skirts and dresses that mostly go to the ankle, so I haven’t seen much need to shave (unless I marry a man who prefers it). Women started shaving as stockings became less available during WWII and as hemlines began moving upward. My dilemma is that unshaved legs are now associated with feminism, but shaved legs became popular in the first place as a result of increasing immodesty, so I’m at a loss what to do.

    Thanks for this lovely post, and have a great day ๐Ÿ™‚


  12. My waist length hair is most often worn up, though I will braid it for a casual look. I don’t often wear it down which makes for a special treat for hubby when I do wear it down, most often in private. I do dye my hair because the original color faded and I started going gray fast and it really looked terrible on me, so I dye my hair to match my eyebrows. Everyone thinks it is my natural color.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I am still pretty young, in my 30s, but have many, many white hair among my brown hair. I struggle with them because I would not mind being all salt and pepper or all white hair despite my young age, but it’s not the case and it’s just ugly. It does not look neat at all, considering that my brown hair and my white hair are not even the same texture.
    What do you recommend, should I cover my white hair or not ?


    1. You can embrace your grays, if you wish.
      However, you can also dye it, if you prefer.
      The modest way to do so would be to dye it in your original colour ie restoring what your original God-given colour.

      The immodest way to dye your hair would be to dye it pink, purple, rainbow or any other colour that is not your natural hair colour.


  14. Is it wrong when we don’t like to wear our hair open/loose/”out”?
    I’m a young black woman. Thank you so much for speaking about Afro hair. It can indeed be styled femininely and when properly cared for it can indeed grow very long like the popular young vlogger in the picture, even when it is coarse and it shrinks. But I personally feel it’s more comfortable when my hair is in a bun or protective style, I can forget about it for the day. Once in a blue moon I’ll blow it out and flat iron it straight (though I’ll still mostly wear it in a pony tail or bun), is this still considered vain? I do remember that in high school, my Religion teacher was the Mother Superior..a wonderful Australian nun who was a great influence in my life. I was a boarding student and she didn’t like it when I came back from the Christmas holiday with (chemically) straightened hair… She was unto something. Glad to have stopped all that years ago. Chemical straighteners aren’t healthy and their frequent use can not only affect our health, it is also terribly vain in my opinion (though I may be falling into scrupulosity here).


    1. I don’t think i ever said it is wrong to not wear our hair loose, so you are making a GROSSLY INACCURATE ASSUMPTION.

      I have very thick afro textured hair and for my day to day errands, i am always in a bun, chignon, updo, or ponytail.

      Please read the text properly before jumping to conclusions next time, perhaps?


      1. To clarify, it was just a question that sprung to my mind, more of a reflection on my own habit of always wearing my hair up. I didn’t mean to come across as having made an assumption, and of course no disrespect was intended. God bless.

        Liked by 2 people

  15. Paige, I’m really struggling with this. My hair is medium long, a few inches below my shoulders. It’s flat and messy and I don’t feel like it gives glory to God. I need some length off for my sanity. How short can I cut it without looking like a feminist? I was considering a lob (a shoulder length bob), but I realized that’s a very common haircut among people like the Kardashians, whom I do NOT want to imitate. What would you advise for me?


    1. I will not recommend cutting off your hair at all. If your hair is flat, limp etc, invest in good hair products or products for hair growth. Condition your hair regularly after each wash and get some layers in your hair – which can help add volume and body.

      Hope this helps


    2. May I recommend investing in some pretty clips and pins and wearing simple updos? Having long hair doesn’t mean always wearing it down, does it? My hair is now quite long, with some gray, and at 50, I just can’t pull off the neat look of full, flowy tresses, so I’ve learned some simple twists and rolls that I can do on my own with pretty claw clips, pins, even flower pins…I must say I feel very feminine. And my husband loves it!

      Liked by 1 person

  16. I’m going to have to say that I disagree about hair care pertaining to black women. Natural afro hair, especially natural 4C type hair is very coarse and extremely hard to maintain. it’s a whole lifestyle. Using protective styling like crotchet or extensions or even wigs, helps keep the hair from breaking off. The picture of the younger black woman with the long straight afro hair does not represent all black women’s hair. We use protective styling to help maintain and keep what God has give us. It is hard for me to wear my hair out naturally especially in harsh winter weather, so I wear hair extensions that tend to mimic my natural hair, to protect my real hair and I don’t think there is anything wrong with that, or with wanting to change your appearance every now and then.


    1. I am black woman with 4c hair and i completely disagree with you. Perms and extensions are not needed, neither are they protective hairstyles. If you want to put your hair in protective style, braid it, cornrow, thread it up a la african style. There are many ways to style and “protect” black hair withou perms, relaxers, texturisers or extensions.

      I got FAR MORE breakage when I wore extensions or relaxed my hair.
      It’s a LIE and MYTH that black women need extensions or perms to “protect” their hair. How do you think our ancestors survived?!

      Manipulating my hair increases breakage and my hair has grown lots from a super simple regimen.
      My protective styles are buns, puffs, updos or simply 2 to 4 braids.

      If I can do it, any black woman can!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. No disrespect intended. I just feel like all afro type hair is different. I even had to dive deeper into my hair care because of my sensitive scalp. I can’t overly moisturize or have really anything on my scalp, which in turn adds to breakage, and I have a hard time figuring out the porosity of my hair as well. I agree that keeping hair moisturized and all of the techniques you suggested. My hair has grown WITHOUT the help of extensions, but I will be honest and say that some extensions have also helped me keep from constantly damaging my hair. I think it just depends on genetics too. Also, to make matters harder for me, I have 4C hair on the top and 4B then 4A the closer you get the the back of my head lol! Aside from that, I see the point of the article and the femininity of long hair. Also, I appreciate your response and I respect your views, but I think this may not be the blog site for me, so I gracefully bow out. God bless you. Thank you ๐Ÿ™‚


      2. No worries. Though you may not find this blog for you, I will still encourage you to care for your type 4 hair as naturally and simply as possible. Our hair does flourish and grow when treated properly. Also, having all those chemicals from perms leeching into the blood system is never good for our health as women. Good luck and God bless!


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