Veiling For Mass When You Are Self-Conscious

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Veiling for Catholic mass is more popular now than it was 10 years ago.

I laugh when I see search phrases like “Is Catholic veiling for Mass in style?” because, in all honesty, veiling for Mass never really went away.

It’s not a trend that is now being resurrected.ย  It has always been there.

Fair enough, since Vatican 2, veiling for Mass kinda fell into disuse because of THIS.

However, in several Catholic parishes around the world, such as villages in Italy, Europe and the South Americas, veiling still persisted.

In any case, I am glad to see it making a “comeback” and becoming more popular, especially among the younger generation, who have a real thirst for Catholic Tradition and authentic liturgy.

Despite all this, I still get a lot of women leaving me comments and messages telling me how much they would love to veil, but as there are little to no people veiling in their parishes, they are self-conscious about standing out in their parish.

In a way, I can relate to their trepidation about veiling because I have also been there myself.

The first time I veiled, as an adult, was at a Novus Ordo parish and I was the only one that veiled……initially, at least.

But a the time, I did not care about drawing attention to myself!

I was just filled with so much joy and love for our Lord that there was no space for self-consciousness about wearing the veil.

I was just too focused on God to be focused on self.

Herein lies what I think would help women who feel self-conscious about veiling in a parish where no-one veils.

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FOCUS ON HIM – ON OUR LORD, THAT IS!

You should be more focused on God than on the reactions of people around you.

Whenever you catch yourself worrying about what people would say or think, or how they would react to you wearing the veil. repeat to yourself as many times as is necessary: “This is not about me; this is about You, Lord! “

Keep your eyes and face forward, towards the altar or the tabernacle, rather than anxiously scanning the Church.

 

FOCUS ON HER – OUR LADY

Remind yourself that you are veiling to emulate our Lady’s obedience to God.

Carry your Rosary in your hand when you veil.

You will be amazed at how much peace, calm and comfort you will find, holding on to our Lady’s hands.

 

DON’T LOOK AROUND

If you start looking around anxiously to read people’s reactions to you, others will pick up on your desperation for validation and approval.

Other women who may be considering veiling will be discouraged from doing so by watching your nervousness

Some may see this as you trying to get approval from others and may try to shame you and shut you down – rightfully so!

Why? Because you should not be veiling to seek approval or validation from others – you are doing it for our Lord. So fake confidence, if you have to, and veil!

Keeping your attention focused on our Lord, the altar, the tabernacle, and holding your Rosary in your hand will give you an air of calm and confidence, even if you do not feel it initially.

When others see you so assured of your conviction to veil, they will respect and admire you, and our Lord even more!

Any haters or trouble-makers wanting to shut you down or ridicule you will be deterred because you look so confident about your veiling.

Any women who are considering veiling, but nervous about it, will feel empowered and encouraged by your actions, and also make the decision themselves to veil.

Any newcomers to the Church or to the faith will have their curiosity piqued and their interest in the faith increased.

Do you know see how much of a powerful testimony you are proclaiming, simply by being quiet, feminine and obedient to God?ย  Do you realise the number of souls you are evangelising to and bringing into God’s Kingdom through your silent act of obedience?!

Veiling at Mass is indeed powerful and a wonderful way to be feminine, traditional, obedient to God and silently drawing others to Him!

And here’s a little secret: when you wear the veil, it shields your peripheral vision from the intrusive gaze of others and also from YOU being distracted by others. Not only does this create a beautifully intimate cocoon between our Lord and you, His precious bride, but it is also a display of modesty, submission, obedient receptivity and feminine beauty.

 

GET A PROP!

Sometimes, having a prop in the form of someone by our side or something in our hands can help divert your hyperfocus on self.

Your prop could be your Rosary, as mentioned above; your friend, a sibling, your husband, or even your baby!

My prop when I first started veiling was my husband!

Having him by my side most likely contributed to me being able to lose some of my self-consciousness and keep myself focused on God.

 

THE QUESTIONS! OH, THE QUESTIONS!!

This may occur on your first day of veiling or several days later, but you may inevitably be asked questions about your veil or your decision to veil.

Do not bring any attention to yourself or to your veil.

Do not talk about it either.

Do, however, respond when you are asked about it

Keep your answers short, friendly and sweet, referring them to online or other resources on veiling, if necessary.

You can even send them to this website or my video

Do not get caught up in arguments and long discussion sessions about veiling and its validity.

It is better for them to find the information from 3rd party sources than for you to come across as ACTIVELY trying to convince them to veil.

Believe me, you wearing the veil is powerful enough to work on their subconscious indirectly.ย  Even if they do not approach you about your veil, they will google it and find answers themselves.

In my case, nobody approached me about my veiling.

However,ย  a few weeks later, I started seeing more and more people veiling in my parish.

My veiling, through Christ’s grace, worked to convince other women to obey God and veil, all without me saying a word! Deo gratias!!

 

KEEP IT SIMPLE; KEEP IT SUBTLE

When you are new to veiling and also self-conscious about it, it might help to keep your veil choices simple.

There is no need to veil according to the liturgical seasons like I mentioned HERE and you may wish to skip Infinity Veils for now

I would suggest veiling according to your hair colour.

If you have dark or black hair, wear a black mantilla veil

ย 

Wear a brown or burgundy veil for brown, red or auburn hair.

 

A gold veil for blonde hair

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Hope you find these tips helpful.

Is there anything else you would add to the list?

Do keep me updated on your veiling progress!!

Our Lady, Sedes Sapientiae, ora pro nobis!ย 

 

ad Jesum per Mariam

๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ™๐ŸŒน

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7 thoughts on “Veiling For Mass When You Are Self-Conscious

  1. I’m in high school and I started wearing a veil a couple months ago, I’m the only one in my family who wears it. I was really self-conscious at first then I noticed a few people started wearing them after I did and a couple weeks ago a little girl behind me in church told her mom, “Look, mommy, she’s a princess!”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I veil whilst in Church – full stop which takes away the ‘went to’ question.

    personally I would not feel happy as a married woman wearing a white veil although I think they look perfect on younger women and all the girls in our family do wear white.

    My experience is that you only feel self conscious the first time after that you feel very self conscious if you do not veil.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Iโ€™m new to Catholicism and would like to start veiling, but my hair is colored blue (I know it may seem strange that I am self conscious about wearing a veil with an obviously noticeable hair color). I see a lot of women wearing white veils, but my hair color would stain them quickly. Iโ€™m also married and have read that most married women wear darker veils. Would it be wrong to wear a light or standard blue veil so that it would blend with my hair color more easily?

    Like

  4. I would ask what your policy is for when to put the veil on and when to take it off. I usually have it on before I enter the nave. I take it off when I exit the nave, but maybe I should keep it on until I exit the church building or maybe when I get to the car?

    Like

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